Poem "voidless"

losing my voice

makes me

think it is eternal

makes me

numb

dumb

constricted

confined

losing my self

makes me

think I deserve it

makes me

slip

tip

tilt

and fall

every fever peak

is a roaring abyss of silence

every valley,

murmuring paradise

to speak

to convey

my emotions, wishes and desires

erosion's

of my soul

take it away

and I withdraw into my shell

of me, lamenting my torture

or is it a gift?

maybe even I

have to learn

"Voiceless is not Worthless"

for I shall never be

wordless

Just have to put up this link because it is so true...

What it looks like when I introduce people to the fandom or tell them I write smutty gay fanfiction!

(actually I am extremely lucky because my partner is one of my biggest fans, sitting all nights rereading my smut with twinkling eyes...)

I wonder how many of us keep quiet about having these sorts of hobbies just to not get condemned by friends, family, even loved ones, and society?

In fact, I will make this my new poll, later on!

We all love bromance! but not all of us sing to it...

Poem "maybe even I"

from far, far, far away

there is no difference

between a planet and a star

they both shine bright

like little glowing embers

but right before you

it is obvious

the star has light and warmth

that comes from deep within

the planet,

none

if there was no star

the planet would no longer shine

but if there was no planet

the star would still

glow

---

I am a planet

a small insignificant

cold place

I whirl around my star

my beautiful

life giving star

I bask in light and warmth

unselfishly given by my star

without ever giving anything back

but

I wish

and strive

and dream

that one day even I

can also give something back

to my beautiful, beautiful star

Happy Birthday to my Beautiful Star

You really wanna kill me with love overflow don't you?

This is incredible!

My super duper fan, Pandoraylam, that did the super ultra great fanart for me for "Warrior Baek Dong Soo" (see this post) has created cover art for my fics (and in super high quality!) - including my "Sungkyunkwan Scandal" fics!

I just have to show you cause I am so impressed and honoured! Here is the one for "Storm":

This is the coolest ever - I really wanted to have something like this but I suck at this kind of artsy stuff so Pandoraylam really is doing me a overwhelming favour!

And showering me in LOOOOOOOOOOOOVE....

Now I can't wait for the rest....(fidget, fidget...)

Poem "twofold"

my love is not like your love at all

your love is

undivided

generous

undemanding

you never hold back

and you don't expect anything from me

while

my love is

small perfectly placed portions

constraining myself within invisible borders

and demand a return

and whilst I unwittingly hold back

I wish, I wish I could be like you

for you deserve so much, so much

but I am so afraid

of losing myself

in the love I have for you

for it is far stronger than me

and much more generous than me

and it is far, far more worthy than me

so please

don't let me go

but try to see my heart

nestled in this concrete of my self

and one day I am sure

it will wither and give back

a thousandfold

what you deserve

SKKS Fanfic Community and "Recommended Reading"

I recently joined a fanfiction community "SKK Scandal @ LiveJournal", they have lots of authors making fanfiction about "Sungkyunkwan Scandal" so all who are interested can head over to their page for great entertainment!

I also have added to "Recommended Reading" one of my favourite "weird" pairing fanfic from "Sungkyunkwan Scandal" - XXX/XXX (I will leave the pairing a surprise! ..the very idea is strikingly appalling yet Decodexx pulls it off brilliantly! Every time I read I cannot stop from giggling...) So head over to read it:

The Real Scandal by Decodexx

I am so proud to be part of this fandom!

from kdramaconfessions

(maybe its so good because we are all respecting each other and what we create instead of acting like rabid sasaeng fans...)

Poem "please don't"

My empty chamber

is crowded

with the repose of moths

I have quenched every flame

for I am afraid

shooting stars will light my rooom

on fire

"New" writer for "Warrior Baek Dong Soo"

Just found this little gem of fanfic for the "Warrior Baek Dong Soo" fandom that I have added to the "Recommended Reading":

"Sun and Sky" by Laine-laine

Its a short fic with the musings of Un-ah about his relationship with Dong Soo, but beware - at first you will find it light, but the end will blow you away!

Oh Ma Gawd! Love overload!

Dudes, LOVE is all around....

You have to check out this amazing pic that my über-cute ultima fan Pandoraylam has made for me! (notice the title of the book Un-ah is reading!!!)



I am so spazzing of sheer ecstasy here...Cannot believe someone actually likes my fics so much they add me into the fandom like this - its like the ultimate LOVE declaration!!! Just like when Anaapenas added me to dongsooslashyeoun ! Gosh, guys, I am overwhelmed!

She has other stuff going too that is amazing but I have to wait for it to be finish....aaaaaaa....I am so impatient....

Poem "true freedom is not what you think"

my body is a cage

a thin, densely packed wiring

confining all that I have inside

all that is me

from escape

I would not want this mortal failing shell

to again resurrect

I would rather shed it

like a cicada

and take to the skies

forever freed of my bonds

and gravity

leaving only an empty husk

on the ground

New Fanfiction with a twist from "Warrior Baek Dong Soo"

I am currently obsessing about the scenario in "Euphoria"...

I have gotten so much brilliant feedback on my smutty "Warrior Baek Dong Soo" fanfic "Euphoria" that I decided to write an alternate version of it since the scenario is just too good to write just one, and I warning you all - I am going to have to keep writing until this scene is out of my head...

This one is more romantic and fluffy, as it was in many peoples comments, and please observe that this is NOT a sequel - it is an ALTERNATE VERSION!

So here you go: "Euphoria: Honeythief" in my AooO with header below.

_____________________________________________________

Title: Euphoria: Honeythief
Series: Warrior Baek Dong Soo
Soundtrack: Honeythief – Halou
Spoilers: -
Time frame: Ep. 17 (first meeting after three years)
Summary: What happens when the puppy you played with and cherished so much, suddenly runs away from you. Did you search for him? Or did you abandon him, like he did you? And if you meet again would you want to punish him or is forgiveness stronger than revenge?
Excerpt: “I am crying and with every tear, I get one step closer to my final dream, a pool of blood and you walking away. For I will drown in this lake of tears and broken dreams and you will walk away, for I am not worthy of anything else.”
Pairings: Baek Dong Soo/Yeo Un
Word count: ~13000
Rating: NC17 (angst galore, smut galore and fluff galore (so much fluff, bunnies are embarrassed) )
Warning:
Other: Since this scenario was just WAY too good to write only one fic about (“Euphoria”) I have here written an alternative version with a different angle. However, I am still reusing some of the original writing from “Euphoria”, especially the beginning and the end is the same with only subtle differences, so don't think you are crazy if you recognise some of it. Text in “bold” is original dialogue from series.
Thanks: To everyone who wanted a more romantic/fluffy love scene in "Euphoria"

Pillow Book "just maybe"

I am not superstitious. Not at all.

Yet, as I laid there in my hospital bed, again, with the weight of an elephant on my chest, trying to gulp in those four deciliters of air that I could manage to keep me conscious and the morbid visions of how my funeral would be if that weight would increase just ever so slightly more, I couldn't help thinking...

Maybe, just maybe, I should have made a wish on that falling star...

I, in my ignorance didn't wish for anything. For I already felt I had it all...

how...arrogant...

From now on, I will make wishes on falling stars...so I at least will not think about it the next time I lie there trying to survive...

Return from Zombie World II...